The letter ‘A’ does not stand for ‘avid fans’

My hometown of Vancouver is a pretty city. Indeed one of the prettiest in my experience, and I have been in my life in a lot of fine towns, cities and boroughs in a number of countries through the years.

Vancouver has an astonishingly lovely mountain backdrop and the sea is omnipresent at its doorstep. It’s actually a rather magnificent burg.

I’ll admit, it has its downsides as well. There is the hideousness of the notorious Downtown Eastside, and the level of street crime and gangsterism is sometimes reminiscent of Chicago in the 1920s and early ‘30s. Shit happens. It’s a big city, and a seaport and has always been an entrepot for the international drug trade. Meanwhile inflated housing and rent prices are well beyond the reach of most, even in the middle classes.

But, Vancouver is also kind of a fucked place. The disgraceful happenings after last evening’s Stanley Cup final in which my hometown was smoked by Boston (let’s be honest, folks, Boston was the superior team) opened to the doors for yet another repetition for the street assholes to, well, take to the streets in their true asshole-ish fashion. ‘Assholes’ is too mild a world for such brain-dead human refuse but, sorry, I was trying to be polite.

And the ‘misbehavior’ was predicted and predictable. Chatting with a friend at coffee yesterday he said, “It won’t matter at all whether the Canucks win or lose, the assholes will be out there raising hell and destroying any positive tone established by the finals. Makes me sick.”

It’s not that Vancouver is the only site of such disgustingness from somebody’s youthful spawn – I assume such creatures have parents and they weren’t just spontaneously generated – it’s just that my hometown has become a bit notorious for appalling behavior by assorted wastes-of-space-and-oxygen. I mean, there are always the English football hooligans that have lowered the tone so much for the legitimate fans of the games. Lowered the tone so much that Brit fans have actually been banned by some EU countries. That’s pretty disgusting.

In this screed I am not blaming the legitimate hockey fans that were, from all accounts, exercising fine behavior at the end, despite their disappointment at the results of that final game. No, I am blaming, as is the case with Brit football trash, the morons who wouldn’t know a hockey puck if they were hit by one.

What motivates them? I have no idea. I do have a functioning brain and emotions, so cannot really identify with the ‘challenged’ in that regard. Of course, mob rule has something to do with it. But, my instinct, and I think the instinct of most is, if an unruly crowd begins to gather, an inner voice suggests: “Let’s get the hell out of here before this turns ugly.” Functioning people have such an inner voice.

How to deal with the cretin brigade? Well, I’ve always fancied the Singapore model of public floggings, and like it even more after last night. But, for some reason, we don’t countenance that. Hefty sentences? Well, at least they’d be with their peers. Attempt to shame them? Good luck with that. They are shameless.

But, something attitudinal is amiss in Vancouver. That is what needs to be addressed, though I am not quite sure what ‘that’ is.

And there is no medical antidote for chronic ‘assholeishness.’




8 responses to “The letter ‘A’ does not stand for ‘avid fans’

  1. Well spake, Ian. I shall share this diatribe!

  2. Eeeowww!
    I just looked at photos of the ‘riots’, and whereas the same few burning autos were being photographed from different angles, making the whole scene seem bigger than it was, what struck me was the urgency with which the ‘children’, i.e.assholes, were photographing themselves as posers in front of the burning police cars.
    Hello…assholes…taking a picture of yourself stomping on top of a police car, or igniting the rag that is sticking out of the police cruiser gastank…hello…does the word “evidence, admissible in a court of law” hold any meaning for you???

    And I hope you have a good alibi for your whereabouts last night Mr. Royal Higness Sir 🙂

  3. It’s not just Vancouver Ian, we had the same thing happen in Montreal a few years ago after they won (or lost, who knows) a series.

    Funny, that never seems to happen in the states.

    Maybe it’s because we Canajuns are so nice and polite the rest of the year that this is how we blow off steam, eh?

    All I can say is that the cops need to crack down. Hard and fast. Wherever this happens. I’m ashamed, knowing that these images made it all the way to Europe.

  4. I honestly think that we should make those responsible not only clean up the mess they cause but work to pay for the damage. Only then, perhaps, will they truly make the connection between their actions and consequences.

  5. It was a sad ending to an exciting and challenging series.
    I fear that making them clean up and pay for damages would not have much of an impact on them. That kind of connection needs to be made when they are young. And I bet the majority weren’t even from Vancouver, so the disconnect is even greater.

  6. This is big news here in NY. I think New Yorkers take their rioting in the streets for sports purposes verrrry seriously.

  7. I’m just so angry about the whole thing, and like Leslie, I can’t BELIEVE all those idiots taking photos and videos of themselves and others doing the damage! These shitheads take stupidity to a new level: property damage as YouTube entertainment. Do they truly think they won’t get nailed? It’ll be pretty easy for the police to identify who did what. It may take some time, but it will happen. When will those jerks learn that the Intarnets is PUBLIC and FOREVER??

  8. I was really surprised when I heard about this. Oddly, after the game, I said to my husband, “Even though they won, I bet the Boston people are going to riot and make fools of themselves.” I would have expected THAT.

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