Too much time spent on our homegrown Chris Farley

I try to get my head around all the public and journalistic fascination with Fat Rob – our own Chris Farley – and can only conclude he’s a bit like one of those Jerry Springer sleazoids. You know, he’s such a lowlife that he makes us feel better about our own transgressions as he continues to drive his train towards the washed-out bridge.

Anyway, I’m tired of the press given to a porky drunk who can define, if nothing else, the word denial.

A couple of points of consideration, in my esteem. The first one being, there are some terrible things afoot elsewhere in the planet and in our own country. Some of the reactionary crap oozing from the backroom boys at the Conservative Convention tend to make some of the most rabid Teapartiers in the US look like cuddly (albeit moronic) pussycats. Don’t worry, by the way, Harper’s too shrewd to act on any of them. But the bastard wants to keep you on your toes.

Then there is the slime oozing from the overprivileged and underworked ‘entitlement obsessed’ senators who are giving the finger to decent Canadians much more forcefully than anything old Rob can muster.

And then we can travel around the world to Syria, Egypt, Afghanistan, reactionary Russia, a US that came within a breath of throwing international economies in the toilet, and so on and so on and so on.

Screw Rob. He ain’t worth the attention.

Secondly, whilst on the topic. Rob has committed no indictable offence – as far as anybody knows. You aren’t going to develop a court case around a guy consuming an illicit substance. If we busted everybody who did such a thing, our courts would be swamped.

And so he hangs out with lowlifes.

And so he gets pissed up in public.

And so he probably has a liver the size of a Winnebego.

And so he pees in alleyways when he thinks nobody’s looking. I think that behavior is pretty much compulsory for drunks.

And so – why the hell do we care so much? Especially since most of us don’t live in Toronto. Thank heavens.


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