Daily Archives: April 9, 2014

If you can’t stand the heat, stay out of the kitchen. OK. Works for me


Once – in another life with another mate – she and I embarked on a venture that led to the sticking on of a major addition to our domicile.

The end result was heavenly. We stuck on a complete wing, turned the carport into a sunken den with cozy wood stove and then two steps that led up to a huge master-bedroom with vaulted and beamed ceiling and tall windows everywhere. I was even more enraptured due to the fact it was my design and it worked.

But, at the end of the day wifey and I were in accord that we would never want to do such a thing again. Well, fate being what it was, we parted never had a chance to test our vow.

We wouldn’t do the thing again due to the mess and disruption of our lives. The house was filled with sawdust and dirt and eventually you don’t even bother with vacuuming. I’d come home from work wondering what our contractor had accomplished that day. Sometimes nothing. Not that he was bad, he was actually very good, but there were days when he couldn’t get the stuff he needed so couldn’t proceed to the next stage. It was wearing and if you are worn enough eventually you get depressed and begin to think the goddamn thing will never be finished. Eventually you reach the stage where you almost don’t care any longer. You’ve lost the will to go on – sometimes literally.

But, as the Kinks song goes, ‘here we go round again.’ No, not an addition this time, but here, in another house in another lifetime with another spouse, we have decided on a major kitchen reno. Two rooms that will sell a house are the kitchen and the bathroom. Interesting, the two ends of the digestive process, but for fear of sounding tasteless, I shall move ahead.

oldOur current kitchen is ‘tired’, I think would be the word. It’s dated. That ‘steam’ microwave is the giveaway. Actually it’s a ‘macrowave’, brutal damn thing. No, it’s not quite that bad, but we have grown tired of its worn nature. But in dealing with that reality we have pissed around for about two years over the matter. But eventually we decided this year will be the year. (Sob).

So the past few weeks have been spend lining up cabinet people and choosing what we wanted those cabinets to look like, and then countertops. Frustrating due to the plethora of choices out there. We’d bring sample possibilities home and while they looked great in the shop they sort of sucked at this end. “I hate that. I don’t want my kitchen to look like that! It (which seemed kind of vibrant in the shop) looks like a Baghdad whorehouse.” Not that I have a clue about the inner workings of a Baghdad brothel. I’m only guessing. And then there was the floor. What material. We rather liked cork but found it to be brutally vulnerable at a few levels. Anyway, we found a floor we fell in love with – eventually after a few dozen fits and starts.

Ultimately we got to the sexy stuff – the appliances. Appliances which meant a new range (why are stoves called ranges, anyway? And the English call them ‘cookers’, which seems a bit more to the point), dishwasher and fridge. All stainless steel, which was what Wendy wanted. Oh, and a new kitchen sink. I cannot get excited about a new sink, though the appliances were a tad of a rush, and we were very grateful for the kind counsel and wisdom of Kathy at Sear’s in Courtenay.

OK, we’ve done that part. Come June the construction part happens. That I am dreading because that will be like the aforementioned addition from years ago. I have no idea of how long it will take. And we will have to make adjustments. We’re hoping for good weather as I think we’ll be doing a lot of barbecuing.

And at the end comes the best part. Paying for the job.