Yet, I do care that Donald Sutherland (and a few other part-time Canadians) has lost his right to vote – that’s despite the fact his first wife is a personal friend and he treated her like shit once upon a time – and that little bit of political effluvia is just one of the reasons I go into the pending election with a greatly enhanced sense of cynicism.
But, despite my cynicism and general distaste for the leading candidates (in all parties) I will vote. I always vote, and invariably am guided by the principle of voting ‘against’ those who revolt me the most. We must vote or this whole ‘democratic’ process is meaningless. Do I think voting should be compulsory, as it is in Australia? No. That affronts the latent anarchist in me. We have a right to not play the game, but I also have the right to choose to do so. That’s one of the few remaining freedoms we have in this here land o’ ours.
Now, since I, in conscience, must vote, then who in hell do I vote for? That’s a tough proposition when one is pretty contemptuous towards all the knaves and knavettes and their parties. Added to which, I am always loath to commit myself. That’s why I have only married three times despite the fact I have met many other charming females with whom I’d have loved to share bed, board, and possibly genitals. But you know, commitment issues.
I have to ask myself, have I ever encountered a politician who has not (unlike fine wines) turned despicable with age and use. They all start out brilliantly, but ultimately they evolve into utter shits and my use for them and their parties crashes and burns.
So what do we have awaiting us sometime this fall (whenever it is)? Well, first off, the same old stupid parties we have always had, and they never get much better but mainly get worse. And already for what seems like half my lifetime we have heard about how Trudeau Jr. Has “nice hair” and at least they spare us the monotone prolix ramblings of Steve and turn over their contempt for Justin (I’m wary of him because mainly he has one of those tiresome ’70s names like Jason) and leave it to the mutterings of a group of 18th rate actors sitting around a table. Gawd I’d hate to be at that meeting.
Anyway, what do we have awaiting us?
Conservatives: I had thought that Brian Mulroney had topped the national polls in terms of almost universal detestation – my ex wife used to turn off the TV when she would hear his smarmy and oily tones therefrom – but if you can judge by Facebook then Mr. Monotone voice ‘helmet hairdo’ elicits unheralded opprobrium of an almost universal nature. However, those who loathe the man should remember that everybody hated Richard Nixon until polling day. For many reasons Steverino seems to have worn out his welcome among those who ‘care’ (whoever they might be) and in that context they will have to give close thought to the alternatives – such as:
Liberals: Young Jason/Justin seems to have an innate ability to find a cowpie and then step in it. He with ‘nice hair’ started with great flourish and it seemed that the Grits had finally found somebody to make up for the huge disappointments of far-too-heralded Ignatieff and the national joke of monolingual Dion. They had this dude. It mattered not a whit that he had virtually no political experience for he was PET’s son-and-heir. But, they seemed to miss the fact he was also Margaret’s son. Not to demean, but mumsy hasn’t been much of a bastion of common sense in her years on the planet. Anyway, don’t count Trudeau fils out just yet but it already seems that the Tories are focusing their energies less on the dude who “just isn’t ready yet” and instead on this guy.
NDP: And ‘this guy’ is Mr. Crankypants, Tom Mulcair. Now, for a guy who was pretty much an unknown commodity before he assumed the helm of the party after the untimely demise of revered Jack Layton, Mulcair ‘The Beard’ has had a lot more impact than people anticipated. He’s bright, articulate and, and this is vital, a damn good street-fighter, handy with his political dukes in a manner much more pugnacious than Trudeau has yet shown. Known to have a bit of a firebrand temper his handlers, however, have gotten him to tone down to good effect. He is, sans doute, Steve’s most formidable adversary. At the same time he is, however, a ‘socialist.’ For those comfortable with that, like assorted teachers and other unionized groups, that’s OK. For others the concept strikes a bit of terror – much of the terror being relatively unfounded. And then there is always the matter of the recent Alberta election. Who’da thunk? Don’t count Mulcair out, a reality of which Steve is probably fully aware.
Greens: Ms. May is a nice lady and a bright lady and also kind of a fiscal conservative (in the small ‘c’ sense) so she might quite possibly get back in. I hope she does. She’s a voice of honesty. However, will the Greens be a big factor? Methinks not.
So, there you have it. When you cast your ballot think long-and-hard and please don’t just stay home – unless you’re Donald Sutherland.