I’m far from being the best I can be, but as the Beatles sang: ‘I’m getting better all the time’

bestI etched this out a few years ago. Time to check in and see how I am doing.

Rules o’ life to be aspired to


  1. A tendency to think and act spontaneously rather than on fears of past experiences. Ha. Not very successful in that regard. Not crippling but irritating. Spontaneity, how is that defined?
  2. An unmistakable ability to enjoy each moment. This is an aspect of me that has vexed all my life. I have had wonderful adventures through everything from travel to sex and a whole lot in between. Yet, I often feel I am not right in the moment. I can look at photos of say the Cook Islands, Hawaii or London and think that I was there and it was lovely, but did I get the full impact at the time. I can think of women I have ‘been with’ (a polite way of suggesting torrid intimacy) and the memories can be delicious, but did I fully appreciate the moment or moments? God. I hope so. Otherwise, what a waste
  3. An unmistakable ability to enjoy each moment. Ties in with the preceding item. But the point being, it is an ‘ability’. Have I learned to do so. I hope so – sorta, kinda. It’s a learning curve thing. It’s all about being ‘present in your life.

4. A loss of interest in interpreting the actions of others. They gonna do what they gonna do regardless of what you want so let it go. This one is tougher than it seems.

5. A loss of the ability to worry. Worry is an ‘ability? Who knew?

6. Frequent, overwhelming episodes of appreciation. We get into depressive episodes of dwelling on the negatives. I know I sure as hell do. Take the recent and hideous American election. Nothing I can do about Trump being the leading fuckpig of the known universe, so I extend my appreciation to the Obamas and their inspiration and that leaves me with hope for the world that there are others of their ilk.

7. Contented feelings of connectedness with others and nature.
I love a walk in the woods with my wife and dog. I adore my friends; some of them perhaps more than they know or more than I have told them.

8. Frequent episodes of smiling. I
smile a fair amount Smiling and laughter I do believe are good for the soul and mental health.

9. Letting things happen instead of forcing things to happen.
I have gotten better at this, I do believe.

10. A willingness to be vulnerable and show emotions.
I have always been vulnerable and emotional and I accept that. Latterly I have noticed that the cries of babies make me misty. I like that.

11. A giving and receiving of love without strings attached.
As the great Hank Williams said: “Unchain my heart and set me free”. And that’s what it’s all about – freedom.


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